Some living citizens remember a time when the United States had two political parties.  The Republican party, or GOP, stood for commerce, hard work, and individualism.  The Democratic party stood for charity and community.  Differing ideologies lead to different positions on various political, social, and diplomatic issues.  There was choice, albeit limited, in American politics.

Today, the former rivals have quietly merged into a single party.  The Donkey and Elephant have mutated into a hybrid Donkeyphant.

Democrats and Republicans are, of course, far too sophisticated to publicly announce their merger.  The signs above party headquarters still read the same but their internal operations have combined in ways that would make even Teddy Roosevelt hopping mad.  

The Democratic and Republican parties are controlled by a small number of the world's tycoons and robber-barons.  A handful of the world's wealthiest families control both parties via campaign contributions, either made directly, as in the case of Chinese officials, or indirectly by their corporations; for example, Rupert Murdoch and his News Corporation.  These "contributions" (aka bribes) are made with the understanding that the purchased Donkeyphant will pass legislation allowing the rich to get richer (aka "free trade"), and interfere with bills that promote any sort of progress for everyone else, such as a single-payer healthcare system.

Without any real choice between candidates, today's elections are mere formalities.  Less than half of eligible voters participate in national and local elections.  Each year sets a new record for low voter turnout.  Major party candidates have failed to capture the imagination of working Americans.  But they could care less.  Donkeyphants are only focused on those who pay their way.

But there is hope.  The Constitution can be used to break the choke-hold that the rich have on world events.  The freedoms of speech and assembly enable alternative parties to represent the majority of working-class citizens.

But it won't be easy.  Alternative parties, such as the Greens, are ignored by corporate-owned mass media who own the majority of radio, newsprint, television, and web media.  Greens are characterized as starry-eyed loons, if mentioned at all.  Libertarians are wackos.  Independents, well, they're harmless and, better yet, self-destructive.

Like the soldiers that slaughtered the original inhabitants of the "New" World,  the employees of media conglomerates are just doing what they can to hold on to their jobs in order to feed their dysfunctional families.  They are not the enemy.  They're pawns, they're destructive, they're miserable and lifeless, but most of all, they're irrelevant.  Let them air The National Enquirer every night at 6 PM if that's what pays their bills.

As Jello Biafra, former lead-singer of the Dead Kennedys and victim of Tipper Gore and her band of right-wing radicals (husband included), says: Don't blame the media -- become the media!

For the rest of us who want the United States to mean something less shameful in the 21st century, we at Donkeyphant propose the following:

The Seven Habits of Highly Effective US Citizens

1. Ignore the dominant party politicans.  Working with self-proclaimed Democrats or Republicans is a waste of time.  They're bought off, self-absorbed, and indifferent to world events.  Most of them also lack energy, creativity, or a conscience.  Don't associate with anyone who would let 5,000 Iraqi children die each month just because the president told them to.
2. Register yourself as an alternative-party member
3. Get to know your alternative-party candidates.  Support them financially and at the polls.
4. Run for office as an alternative-party candidate.
5. Become the media.  Record and transcribe the actions of corrupt leaders with tape records, webcams, and camcorders.  If it ain't on tape, it didn't happen.
6. Strive for social justice.  Inflation may be low in the US, but that's because corporations pay their overseas workers close to nothing and intimidate the labor force through state-sponsored violence.
7. Plan for seven generations:  seven generations from now, will the planet's inhabitants be as blessed as today?  Or will most life forms be extinct from corporate plundering of public resources?

We may never see the day when these habits materialize into real choice on the ballot.  There will be (and have been) exciting victories and frustrating losses.  Those who have been shut out of the "new economy" can make a positive difference locally and globally.  The Constitution is still the law of US soil and provides the hope for a better tomorrow.  Act before the world's Rich and Famous burn it to ashes.